Redneck Hornet Tennis

Our family spent the last weekend in the woods as three of us pursued the elusive elk. We enjoyed some great cooking; one day was spaghetti, then black bean and lentil soup, followed by jambalaya. The granddaughters love to camp out and find the natural world a source of endless wonder.

I find archery elk hunting the most challenging animal I have ever pursued. Friday I hunted from the ground blind and the elk were at the tree stand on a forested hill, so Saturday I hunted the tree stand. The elk were about one hundred and fifty yards below me walking up and down an old road. Sunday I set up in some big cedars along the road but the elk were elsewhere. Are you sensing any frustration here? God made elk quite intelligent with a nose that can smell humans hundreds of yards away, big brown eyes that detect the slightest movements, and ears that can hear a pine cone drop from a tree two drainages over. How am I supposed to get one within thirty yards?

One thing about camping with our family is that we are always open to a new ways to entertain ourselves. Jolene and Vance brought up a bee killer that looked like a small tennis racket except this one can be electrified. The handle is filled with D batteries to deliver 1500 watts of shock to a hornet. We soon went crazy swatting these pesky critters as they got zapped, snapped, and sometimes just went up in smoke. Many hornets and yellow jackets never returned to their nest. I think this sport could qualify for the summer Olympic Games and Ardella and I would be a mean pair’s team. We are looking for other couples that would like to compete in Redneck Hornet Tennis. The champion hornet killer was our dog Sadie. A hornet stung her on the hip and she declared war on them for the rest of the weekend. Sadie wasn’t content to just snap at one that buzzed her; she would look around for one and run it down.

As our granddaughter Lizzie says. “We were making memories.”